“Lord, I’ve been transformed by your power to magnify the light within me. The everlasting light becomes me in ways I cannot count. However, the song you sing to my heart is the wisest start ever glowing, igniting passionate waves of emotion within my soul. However, I cannot cast aside my grief even for a moment, because the song my spirit sings is one of tragic end,” I cried to the Lord as I lay in my bed with my face buried in my pillow.
I tossed and turned in the mid hours of night. My heart trembled at the slightest sound coming from my open window. Even the crickets couldn’t soothe my nerves with their musical interludes. There was no peace within my heart. For it was troubled by my past whose sharp notes continued to echo in my mind, even when I slept.
Twisted up in my blankets, I drifted off to sleep. I fell into the pools of dreams, lost inside my own consciousness. For it was the subconscious speaking to me with thereafter a night foretold by the wisest king of all.
I wandered down the streets when the sun scorched my flesh. I was lost with no where to go. I kept on walking on the side walk. On my journey, I passed many homes. I was looking for my family. Unsure of myself, I stopped to look around the yard. However, my relatives were no where to be found. I entered the house. The living room was filled with white upholstered furniture, soft lush white carpet, a floor lamp whose top almost resembled a Tiffany, but not quite. Only the light coming through the windows lit up the living room. The lamp was turned off. I ran over to the windows to look out at the sky, but my heart sank when I saw dark clouds overhead.
“Where is my family? I want to go home to my family. Why aren’t they here where they should be,” I cried as I walked over to the sofa and fell into the warmth of the empty house.
As I lay there, I drifted off to sleep, and fell even deeper into the realms of dreams. It was a dream within a dream. I was walking down another street. The homes I passed were unfamiliar to me. I didn’t dare enter any of them for fear I would be disappointed from not finding my family members within any of them.
There were some small pieces of rock on the ground. I knelt down, picked up a piece, and began writing my hopes and dreams on the sidewalk. I started out by writing whatever popped into my head. I wrote phrases for possible poems. The first was, “As I listen to the storm of my heart, I shaken by the darkness brewing. It burns like a fire; yet, it’s cold like ice. It’s bite stings the inner walls of my flesh. I cannot move, because I’m trapped while living inside myself.”
I set the rock down, pushed myself up, and continued walking down the street. I glanced to my right at a beautiful white colonial style house. I had a strong, positive happy feeling. I ran towards it, but I was stopped by the Lord who put his hand on my shoulder, and said, “You will not enter the house at this time, my child.”
“But my family is in there. I know it because I can feel their presence. Please let me go inside to meet up with them, Lord. I need them right now,” I wept while using my hands to cleanse away my pain with my tears.
“I’m sorry, my dear. I cannot let you do that. You have work to do here. You’ve started something beautiful. You must finish what you’ve started,” he said as he lead me away from the house, and walked me back to the direction from hence I came.
He brought me back to the spot where I began my writings on the sidewalk, and said, “My dear, pick up the rock you used for this beautiful piece of writing, and use it to complete your life. You’ve only just begun living, my child. I want you to learn from you life, and share it with the world.”
© Copyright, Kiki Stamatiou, 2015